1
doctor appointment
I'm late,
and running
cold air wracks my lungs-
the irony!
2
bright morning
dark thoughts-
passing time
having tea in the
cafeteria
3
after my scan
I assist
a blind woman-
she's next,
and I forget my pain
4
for the nurses' station
I bring cookies
and regret
it isn't
something healthy
5
anxious to park,
drivers' tempers
in contrast
to accepting fate
in a private ward
6
basement lab
in the bowels
of the hospital,
I drop off
jars of my urine
7
I smile,
rushing through
Emergency's lounge,
their Christmas tree
is still up
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Author's Comments
As some of my watchers and close dA friends know, I've been undergoing a lot when it comes to recent health issues and how I've been addressing them prior to possible surgery. It was bound to happen sooner or later that I'd write some little ditties about my experiences. I actually enjoyed writing this set which are about real moments & observations at the hospital where I go for appointments regarding scans, tests, consultations - the drama around me as well as the warmer ones. Of the people working to help others, and those being helped.
My gratitude goes out to all of you who have offered your encouragement, and to those who come by and give me your thoughts. Thank you, and a safe & healthy year. p.s. please excuse the title -- blame it on the Vicodin. |
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Comments
Numbers 3 and 5 display excellent turns in imagery. In number 3, there is a sense of self-sacrifice and introspection that really illuminates this piece.
In number 5, you are calm, resigned to whatever may happen in what seems to be a final shade of life. This is a direct contrast to the drivers who are furious over a transient moment (needing to park) that has no effect on their ultimate fate. This too is a beautiful turn and glimpse into the human condition.
beautifully done SG!
--
"I plan on living forever; so far so good"~Steven Wright
That is mainly why this is so good, but I am sad that you are having to go through all of this, although it is good that you can write about it.
--
THIS IS THE GATE OF HEAVEN. ENTER YE ALL BY THIS DOOR. (This door is kept locked because of the draught - please use side door.)
I am not all that familiar with the Tanka form, but I really like it. Especially the fact that each of these separate could still make really nice poems on their own, but at the same time, still able to link them together
--
Perhaps we're too close to the happiness
to know how to picture it
You know already that I'm sending you all the good will and thoughts that I can muster, and I remain hopeful for your return to good health.
--
玉: 我的天使 ♥
Always look on the bright side... there's more light there and it's easier to find stuff.
6 was kinda eww, but good tie in with "bowels of the hospital".
Hope you feel better soon.
--
“Now me lay down to sleep.
Mow da zeebas down like sheep.
Give dem to me nice and dead.
Me no happy ‘til me fed.”
-Bedtime prayer of crocs, Pearls Before Swine
My Faith in Humanity:294
As far as the writing goes, I'm not sure I could muster anything constructive just yet, but it is 2 am. I'll give this another look at a more reasonable hour of the day.
--
"That's right kiddies, don't drink or you'll end in gaiou's scraps and people will make fun of your ass" - =Thiefoworld
*Adopt-A-Writer | =DailyDeviants | *Trashrock | *Writers-Workshop
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