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even unseen-
he touched my eyes,
burning his image
upon the retinas

a slow animation-
ceiling light on his skin
making fuzzy halos
on the edge of his limbs

even unspoken-
the canals of my ears
resonate wordless
with his melody

rapid breath synced
with desperate whimpers
are abridged  
by a throaty chuckle

even untouched-
every cell of my body
has mutated
into a whole other being

synaptic sparks of my brain-
a cacophony
of migrating birds
drowns painlessly

even unknown-
I am helpless to reverse
nor would I try if I could,
it's the way it is

how I drift day-to-day
living beyond consciousness-
having changed him as much
as he has me
©2008-2009 `jade-pandora
:iconjade-pandora:

Author's Comments

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Comments


love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconretrozombie:
Jade, this is incredible! The imagery, and the emotion... I can see and feel them so keenly.
I'm at a loss for words to really describe how this piece has moved me.

:+fav:

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玉: 我的天使 ♥
Always look on the bright side... there's more light there and it's easier to find stuff.
:iconluandrei:
Incredible as alway I love the flow... and the whole idea of completement. :+fav:

--
A.C.A.M
:iconaqua-rat:
A sharp and intense expression of the pain and ecstasy of unrequited love. I particularly liked the image of the cacophony of migrating birds.

--
THIS IS THE GATE OF HEAVEN. ENTER YE ALL BY THIS DOOR. (This door is kept locked because of the draught - please use side door.)
:iconkeraness:
I love how you can create such amazing imagery with the simplest of words. I enjoyed the subtle repetition and the evenness of the pacing. I especially like the third stanza. :)
:iconirvon:
Wow. You manage to use short, nearly technical language to describe complex emotions, without almost ever naming them, creating wonderful imagery along the way. I also love the binding of the stanzas into groups of two, giving the poem a really natural flow. And the ending is just perfect :)

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I(now) = I(now - Δt) + Δt ∙ I(now - Δt) for Δt → 0
:iconredsailsunfurl:
Very moving. Touches close to home and takes me back to the instant when time stands still, if only for a brief moment....

--
"It is a dreamer who knows the true longing for places only traveled in the imagination..... "
:iconjade-pandora:
Thank you for your words towards my humble attempt. :rose:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lately, I continue to struggle through health issues, to regain strength so I can catch up with replies to comments, to comment on deviations, to thank those who have fav'd my works, and to fave works of others who's efforts I admire by those I know & discover here on dA. Your patience, friendship, and understanding is so very appreciated. I pray this comment/reply finds you exceptionally well, and that your holidays are everything wonderful!

--
:iconjade-pandora:
How wonderful your perception, even noticing the sets of stanzas within the piece -- thank you so much for your lovely & supportive thoughts! :fragile:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lately, I continue to struggle through health issues, to regain strength so I can catch up with replies to comments, to comment on deviations, to thank those who have fav'd my works, and to fave works of others who's efforts I admire by those I know & discover here on dA. Your patience, friendship, and understanding is so very appreciated. I pray this comment/reply finds you exceptionally well, and that your holidays are everything wonderful!

--

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November 8, 2008
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