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An image flashes and shows me
sitting quietly
waiting for the signal
to continue on my way

but I never make it.
From behind
a vehicle fast approaching
unseen and unheard

until it's upon me
and ends my journey,
all of my journeys
in the blink of an eye

a dazzling hail of glass
in colors of the street lights,
a violent whiplash of my hair
flowing through water

the windshield
a wide-angle view one second,
a pane of white mesh the next
wrapped around my body

and every poem,
every love letter,
get-well card and shopping list
I would ever write

spills out of me
till it's all floating
in the oil-slick puddles
on the road and the pavement

my mind already sluggish
as I sat, placidly content
after a large dinner
an hour before

giving my car the reins
knowing the way home
and so happy that moment,
I didn't realize how much

now that night had come,
surrounded by a galaxy of
city lights like so many stars.
And all I remember feeling
was the love-

             only love-

                       only

                           love.
:bulletred: 11/28/11: Featured here [link]
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:iconmagicaljoey:
MagicalJoey Featured By Owner Dec 17, 2011   Writer
I liked the part about every poem flowing out of the victim. It reiterates that what we write comes from our very inner beings, even if it is something as simple as a shopping list.
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:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Dec 19, 2011
Thank you so much for giving me your thoughts on my piece, I always appreciate you coming by. <3
Reply
:iconmagicaljoey:
MagicalJoey Featured By Owner Dec 19, 2011   Writer
It was nice to give thoughts - I rarely do it now except in a formal crit because I tend to get too 'critty' in my comments and not many people like that.
Reply
:icontonguebox:
tonguebox Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2011
As has been mentioned.. stanza 6 and 7 are quite ingenious. :)
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Dec 10, 2011
:aww: Thank you so much.
Reply
:iconpursuingthecerberus:
PursuingTheCerberus Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2011  Professional Writer
to make death so poetic and beautiful while maintaining the drama and grief is such an accomplishment displayed perfectly here:

"a dazzling hail of glass
in colors of the street lights,
a violent whiplash of my hair
flowing through water"

WOW.

"and every poem,
every love letter,
get-well card and shopping list
I would ever write

spills out of me
till it's all floating
in the oil-slick puddles
on the road and the pavement"

^WOW. Seriously...this is gut-wrenching and emotional. The kind of thing that really gives one chills and nearly evokes tears. The death of a person is so much more than the loss of their presence here on the planet, but the impact they would've had on the world, on other people. This is perfectly portrayed here in this stanza!!! WOW!

After completing the reading of this piece the title which seemed a bit drab after the earlier stanzas, really hits home. And isn't it the truth...death grabs you at the most unexpected moments...someone feeling sluggish after a big meal, driving a way they've driven a million times before...ended by anothers negligence.

FANTASTIC JOB!!!!
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Nov 30, 2011
William...

William William William...

you make me feel like I've written something brilliant, when in fact, I'm simply grateful you gave my poem another chance in spite the unimpressive title (which it is at first glance, true).

How can I thank you any other way for having taken time to give me your insightful thoughts? I don't think I can do the effort justice.

Thank you...
Reply
:iconpursuingthecerberus:
PursuingTheCerberus Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2011  Professional Writer
You know...I had a pretty crumby day today and to log on and find your comment really brightened it.

Your title isn't unimpressive, please don't misunderstand my comment. I'm one of these poets that labors greatly over the titles of things. I'm obsessed with words and in a title I need to see visual appeal, intrigue and curiosity as well as a deeper meaning to the poem....but I don't expect everyone to think that way. Sometimes simple is better! Sometimes analyzing something too much is unnecessary...your title is powerful once you've read the poem!

"How can I thank you any other way for having taken time to give me your insightful thoughts? I don't think I can do the effort justice."

You can thank me by continuing to be wonderful and talking to me on here. You have done my effort justice just by being you so, thank you. I can sense the sincerity in your comment and it means the world to me.
Reply
:iconwei-en:
wei-en Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2011
Lovely, yet so very sad...I really like this.
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2011
aw thank you so much, Alex, I'm glad. And welcome to dA! <3
Reply
:iconwei-en:
wei-en Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2011
Thanks :)
Reply
:iconmonstroooo:
monstroooo Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Congratulations! :party: :w00t: You've been featured in this week's :earth:Weekly Roundup! :squee::squee:

:iconwritersink:
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2011
Oh gosh what a wonderful surprise - thank you so much! :hug:
Reply
:iconmonstroooo:
monstroooo Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
You're very welcome :D
Reply
:iconideyanight:
IdeyaNight Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2011  Student Digital Artist
Your imagery is brilliant and I really like the
6th and 7th stanzas.
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2011
Thank you so much, I appreciate you letting me know your thoughts on my poem. <3
Reply
:iconjanoera:
Janoera Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2011  Student Digital Artist
I like this line "until it's upon me
and ends my journey,
all of my journeys
in the blink of an eye"

A very philosophical poem about sudden death.
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2011
Thank you so much, Janoera - yes, that's exactly what it's about. That life happens when we least expect it. <3
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
oh wow I love that last stanza. I had kind of zoned out in the middle of the poem but then I hit that last stanza and I realized I had to read it again and again and again.
It's just such a beautiful break down.
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2011
Thank you so much, I'm glad you gave it another chance.
Oh and btw, I noticed you live in Texas - my goodness - I know more people on dA who are from or live in Texas than anywhere else in the world!
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
haha Texas is a big place but it's weird I have yet to meet someone on DA from here.
Maybe it's a sign - you ought to move to Texas! :)
Reply
:iconthemaideninblack:
TheMaidenInBlack Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2011
I like the stanzas

and every poem,
every love letter,
get-well card and shopping list
I would ever write

spills out of me
till it's all floating
in the oil-slick puddles
on the road and the pavement


the image is just sweet, like all of them are contained in the blood that comes out.

Thinking of how ephemeral we are, and of how easily our life can be taken away from us, makes me want to enjoy it that much more. To hold on to it, to fight for it to be happy; it makes me want to hold on to my only love.

:hug:
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2011
:hug: Exactly exactly exactly.
Reply
:iconthemaideninblack:
TheMaidenInBlack Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2011
:heart:
Reply
:iconthetaoofchaos:
thetaoofchaos Featured By Owner Mar 13, 2011   Writer

a dazzling hail of glass
in colors of the street lights-


marvelously described!
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2011
That means a great deal...
Reply
:icontallcanxd:
TallCanXD Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2009  Hobbyist Artist
Great as always!
XD
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2009
aw I wouldn't say "always" - but thank YOU... as always! :hug:
Reply
:icontallcanxd:
TallCanXD Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2009  Hobbyist Artist
Your welcome!
XD
Reply
:iconkennethsnow:
KennethSnow Featured By Owner Mar 15, 2009  Student Writer
brilliant images...excellent poem. :clap:
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Mar 15, 2009
:thanks: thank you ever so much!
Reply
:iconb1gfan:
b1gfan Featured By Owner Mar 15, 2009  Student Writer
i do hear you :) i do
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2009
:frail:
Reply
:iconetienneell:
etienneell Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
I can indeed, and how many tales I have to tell....
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2009
thank you - and what kind of tales - are they of or for me?
Reply
:iconetienneell:
etienneell Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
well if I knew you... maybe tales of you, but for now tales of loves lost and dreams forsaken :(
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2009
that was one time of many when my insight totally deserted me :raincloud:
Reply
:iconsomnomollior:
somnomollior Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2009   Writer
Very sad and very dramatic. Yes, it can all be taken away in a moment. Thinking that always makes me value what I have now.
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2009
yes - and yet it's not meant for us to anticipate the loss...

only live for now, the moment, and the love :heart:
Reply
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